“which celebrity would you feed to a dinosaur and why?”

06Nov09

Warning: This post may include over usage of the term “bad ass”. May this be a fair warning!

Most people would view being eaten by a dinosaur as a negative thing and would often answer this question with the name of certain unlikable celebrities I dare not mention online. I, however, seem to be the only person who thinks that being eaten by a dinosaur would be an absolutely bad ass death. Think about: “death by dinosaur” would be one of the best things a person’s death certificate would say! No one would mess around with the kin of someone who was devoured by a ravenous, prehistoric carnivore!

Only someone so amazingly bad ass can be immortalized with this kind of bad-ass death. There are, after all, only two circumstances where you can find a real dinosaur in this day and age: (a) You suddenly find one due to some crazy, random happenstance a la Jurrasic Park (Cool.) or (b) Someone invents a DeLorean that transports us to the past and brings back a dinosaur as a souvenir (COOL!).

That being said, I find that the single most bad ass person worthy of such an end would be Chuck Norris. Yes, Chuck Norris, internet phenomenon and star of Walker, Texas Ranger. (I know some of you wiser folks out there can name some other awesome and  completely kick ass celebrities out there, but cut me some slack. I grew up in this era, and this is the era I am stuck with.) Chuck Norris has become the bad ass of the internet era and therefore deserves to die in an equally bas ass death.

You have been Norris’d.

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Tags: Chuck Norris